Pets

Front and back clip, five points of adjustment

Stays put, even for an enthusiastic eater

Twenty minutes of nose work indoors

Memory foam base, cover off in one zip

Climbing rope core, visible at 150 metres

Quiet enough to leave in a bedroom

Rolled, so it does not part the coat

Nice enough to leave in the living room

Two bowls, at the right height

Bent plywood, no cartoon paw prints

Sisal and wool, no beige carpet

Turns a 40 second dinner into eight minutes

Floats, and does not wreck teeth

For the sofa you are pretending they stay off

Three strand cotton, survives a serious game

Raised sides for a cat that likes a wall

Raised lip, so spills stay on it

Six mice, refillable pouch

Holds 12kg, leaves no marks

Level two, for the dog that solved level one

Tall enough for a full stretch

Sits on the worktop without apology

Holds a 12kg sack, keeps the oils fresh

Solid brass, refills with any roll

Leads, harness and a shelf for the keys

Cut to standard crate sizes, bound edge

Three steps, for old hips and short legs